Day 1

The big day has come. We finally learned what ward we are going to be assigned. I can remember how my conversation with my interviewer went -- it was weird. I talked weird, gave weird answers, didn't explain myself well. LOL. In the end there was one thing that I learned... he was cute.

Anyway, I'm not about to praise his smile or whatever, I just want to express myself as a novice nurse.

I really admire what the theorist Patricia Benner said about the experience of a nurse. She believes that people can acquire skills without knowing why, they just have to know how. In addition, she ranked nurses based on experiences. When I found my category, I was very relieved. Novice: No experience.

It's like end of story for the drama I was undergoing. I hate how institutions appears to be monsters and perfectionists that once you enter their vicinity, you got to have hands that moves quickly and all those. Too bad, there ain't no one in the nursing industry who gains a lot of money instantly. It's hard work. ALL hard work.  You work without pay? What other job would do that.

I don't know if later on, I will think or weigh which one do I prioritize.

In the long run I might even realize, that because I love what I am doing I want to start challenging myself. Be competitive in the nursing field and satisfied every single day that "Thank God! I am a Nurse"

Right now, my heart is filled with fear. My hands will tremble... well hopefully not. I mean I know I would really feel so low even if I am already licensed. It's so different.

Despite of that feeling, I am telling myself that I can do it. I am trying to reduce the fear I am feeling. I am slowly converting fear into concentration, presence of mind, and stock knowledge. Combine the 3 and then POOF. A new skill is the result.

One of the organic nurse says, "Keep calm and slowly build confidence" I can't help but nod my head.

I am expecting shouts, misbehaviours, test of knowledge. Sure. Go. Bash. Trash talk? I've played games to test my capacity. hahaha.

Yup.
Journey continues.

Carpe diem :)