Isn't it ironic?

Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you

When you think everything's okay and everything's going right

And life has a funny way of helping you out when

You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up

In your face

What's happening to me now, I find it a big mystery. How I got here was not based on my efforts alone. I didn't dream or thought this would happen. I just... go with the flow. My mind is filled with thoughts that would probably kill me, make me depressed, and make me feel worthless at times -- but still I know I want to do this. I want to improve, I want to be of service. I want to feel worthy, alive, and happy of what I will do. 

Happiness is a hard find. Or probably I'm just making it hard for me sometimes. Although I pray that I will be able to get out of my cage and fill my empty soul. Yes I feel caged and empty. 

Goodluck to me!